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He or She Seems Perfect: Are you committing too soon?

a man and woman in an intimate hug


It’s been my experience after conducting readings for the last 30 years that when it’s right – when the two of you meet and mesh so beautifully together from the very start – the cards in a Personal Prophesy reading will even confirm this long before your individual paths intersect.

It’s a meaningful, profound soul mate connection that’s perceived.

The Universe/Higher Power has ordained that the two of you will come together and build a love-filled life that will fulfill every hope and dream you’ve ever had for the future.

How often does this happen in readings?  Seriously…rarely.

I say this because it seems that most generally those who come to me for readings are desperate, needy, in search of being rescued by someone/anyone offering love – or at least a near facsimile – in their lives. They essentially can’t cope with being alone.

For a man, it tends to be ‘arm candy’.  A gorgeous woman he will show off to his peers and give her whatever she wants to try to keep her with him.  A woman will instead clutch at whatever is available and try her best to make it work, even if her heart isn’t invested.

They engulf themselves in dating so many potential long-term partners to try to put that elusive puzzle piece into place where their lives are concerned that it takes on a dizzy pace. One man or woman after another.Dating ferociously.

What’s the answer to all of that needy, clutching ferociousness? 

Intuitively speaking,  the answer is to just plain stop. STOP. Stop trying to put yourself out there, dangling yourself as if you are bait on a hook to reel in a meaningful relationship. Stop trying to make ‘this one’ or ‘that one’ somehow fit into your own life.  Stop trying to be “rescued” by someone when the reality of the situation is that you must rescue yourself first.

Here’s what’s crucial to our own happiness in the future:  if you aren’t centered and healthy within yourself, you’ll only attract the same in future partners, enduring one disastrous relationship after another. To get yourself *right* for the future, let it all go. You’ll find yourself stronger and wiser in the process!

He or she seems perfect after you’ve dated a dozen times.

You’ve likely slept together. Is he or she really The One considering the longevity of your dating relationship thus far?

I hate to the bearer of bad news, but chances are that your card reading will reveal that he/she isn’t the *One* for you.


Because the two of you are realistically on your best behavior. Find out who each of you honestly are by starting out as friends first. It’s the best foundation I know of  for a lasting relationship for the future after more than three decades of reading cards.

Give a new relationship the “acid test” by being precisely *who* you are from the very start. Show your potential partner while dating your quirky, whacky, real self. If you are a “car dancer” like I am, do it. If you are silly and enjoy being spontaneous, do it. If you love to jump into fountains or you drink tequila or you enjoy smoking weed and cigarettes on Saturday nights, do it.

Be “who” you really are.

And most importantly, don’t commit too soon. The more time you give a new relationship initially, the more it has potential to grow and evolve for the future.

Remember, love at first sight is extremely rare.  Hold out for real, lasting love by nurturing and enabling love when the time is right – when the two of you find each other and you know from the bottom of your heart that this is the *one* for you. ‘

That’s the kind of love that will last for the rest of your life.